How To Regain Self-esteem After A Break-up

Self-esteem can be affected after a break-up. For this reason, it is important to know how to deal with it and how to act to overcome it. In this article, we tell you everything.

The end of a relationship can be painful, especially for your self-esteem. Here are some tips to help you regain self-confidence after a breakup.

If the relationship has been long or toxic, or if it was not mutually acceptable, it’s likely that self-esteem was affected somewhat. And that it takes a lot of pain to overcome it.

Regain self-esteem after a breakup

First of all, you need to understand what self esteem is because it is a word you will hear often. Psychology dictionaries thus often define self-esteem as the evaluation we make of ourselves.

In other words, it includes all the perceptions, feelings, thoughts, and evaluations that we constantly submit to. Some studies highlight this:

If we don’t enjoy good self-esteem, we will hardly be able to live with emotional balance. Indeed, the first step in achieving this is to accept ourselves.

How do we know if a breakup has affected our self-esteem?

After relationships are over, there may be a situation in which emotional distress is experienced. But, that doesn’t have to mean the end of anything else in our life. However, it is also valid to recognize if what we are going through right now is only a crisis of couple. Or else a definitive break.

If it is the latter, we have to understand that all the love we need is inside of us, but we usually seek it outside, and this is one of the big mistakes we make after a breakup.

Dr. Jill Weber says it’s normal to feel confusion, sadness or anger when you mourn the loss of a relationship. However, when relationships end, there is no need for self-punishment or guilt, as we have all been through such circumstances, but they are not what define us.

On the contrary, even if a person is not in our close entourage, life still goes on and we must learn and continue our path of evolution. If you think any of the following are defining you a bit, then this break is affecting your life and it’s time to make some changes.

Indicators of low self-esteem

• The feeling that life has lost its meaning for the person who is gone
• You feel ugly when you look at yourself in the mirror and think that no one else will fall for you
• Likewise, you think the person who left was the perfect person and the only one on the planet for you
• You take the person who left as a point of reference to make comparisons with the rest of the people you know
• An oversight occurs in the personal image and you no longer take care of your appearance
• You no longer feel enthusiasm for anything, your motivation is lost and you are no longer interested in the activities that you used to enjoy.
• Also, you feel that the pain does not allow you to have clear thoughts.
• You feel guilty about several facts. You think that if you had acted differently, in certain situations this person might still be by your side

If you feel that one of these points identifies you, then you must understand that loneliness can also be appreciated, and it is at this point, when we meet, that true love is born.

Steps to regain self-esteem after a breakup

There is no magic formula to recovering from a breakup, it takes time. But the results are amazing, and the love you can feel for yourself after this experience will be much greater. To get started, you should follow these recommendations :

• Unload yourself and go through all the stages of mourning after the break, without trying to suppress it. It’s better to tell someone you trust how you feel, rather than shut up.
• Don’t resort to evasion. You just have to live it, because it is the best way to transform wounds into doors of light to be reborn. After this process, you will be the only protagonist in your life
• After living this moment, you will understand that your life does not depend on this person. Neither should revolve around it. They are two people, two different worlds. And everyone can make the most of your life by harnessing their full potential
• Establish a new routine, break with old customs you had with this person
• Begin the search inward. Happiness is in you and not in someone else’s life. Nurturing love for oneself is a crucial step in seeing our full value. And understand why we don’t deserve to be in certain places with toxic people
• Avoid wear and tear by talking about that person and what happened all the time. It’s good to let off steam, but then we have to regain the attention to ourselves to become our center again.
• Take care of yourself, love yourself, take care of your appearance. Look at yourself in the mirror and see how beautiful you are. From your gaze, not through someone else’s eyes
• Take care of your physical and mental health. Go seek help from a psychologist if you want support, and develop again all those activities that you liked before.
• Surround yourself with positive things, forget sentimental or sad songs in this moment of your life, attract joy

If you love and esteem yourself, you’ll realize that there are parts of you that you didn’t even know.  Things you never imagined doing, but now, with high self-esteem, you can do.